20 ways to IMPROVE your ELEGANCE

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1. Work on your posture
2. Cut the swearing
3. Find your personal style
4. Have three guards before you speak; is this true? Is this nice? Is this necessary?
5. Have a selfcare moment once a week

6. Learn how to tie a tie
7. Sip your drinks
8. Learn to walk on heels
9. Make a list of 101 goals you want to achieve before you die
10. Apologize when you’re wrong, even if it’s hard

“Elegance is not catching somebody’s eye, it’s staying in somebody’s memory.”

11. Sometimes peace is better than being right
12. Always send a thankyou mail/card
13. Have a curriculum vitae, no matter how old you are.
14. Buy yourself fresh flowers
15. Read the newspaper at least once a week

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16. Never check your phone during a conversation
17. Have a confidence playlist
18. Have a signature wine
19. Before you attend a party or a get together, prepare three topics you would like to talk about, based on the attending people.
20. Improve your reading, even if it is by one page a day

I wish you all the stars,

-N

How to get in control

how to be a boss and get your sh*t together.

When winter comes around, I am a sucker for seasonal depression. I need my sun and my light. So, when I feel down I love to reorganize my life. These are the things I love to do to feel in control of my life again.

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Planning

Bucketlist 
Every month or every season I make myself a bucketlist. I write down everything I want to do that period, especially the things I wouldn’t normally do.

Daily planning 
Something I do everyday is planning my day. Knowing what I want to achieve and having everything written down makes me feel organized and ready to start. I also make sure to include at least one thing from my bucketlist.

Mealplanning 
There has been a lot of buzz around mealprepping lately. And I have found it really hard since I still live with my parents. Something I really like is to write down in my notes what I eat in a day. Also I look in the fridge the night before and figure out a nice and healthy breakfast that gets me excited to wake up in the morning.

Calendar 
This one is so important. I always have some kind of calendar or agenda with me. Make sure you write every appointment down so you won’t double schedule. This way you will feel much more organized and on point. This also makes sure you don’t shedule two things at the same time.

Environment

One big ass clean 
So to start off. Take one or to days to declutter EVERYTHING. If you live on your own this will take longer than when you’re living with your parents. I stil live with my parents so I only have to clean my own room. Make sure to declutter in sections. For example start with decluttering your closet. Take everything out, clean the whole closet, sort out your clothes and put everything back in. When the whole closet is done, move on to the next section. Also have one big trash bag with you so you can throw away the unwanted stuff immediately.

Twice a week whipe 
It is very important to clean your environment, and keep it clean. So pick out two days a week where you just take a cloth and some cleaning spray and have a 10 minute clean. This will help you feel organized throughout the whole week and not just after you had you spring cleaning.

Regular decluttering 
Once a month, declutter your closet and desk. Just look through what you have and what doesn’t serve you anymore. You can also put the clothes you’re not sure about in a trash bag and put it away in the garage. Set a reminder for a month later and if you haven’t felt the urge to get a piece of clothing from that bag in 4 weeks, throw it away.

Health

Workouts 
Find your thing. Everyone has their own way of working out. Working out is really good for you mental and physical health. But don’t start doing a certain workout you hate. Ofcourse I think you should experiment, and sometimes you just won’t feel like working out. But if you hate running, don’t run. For example, I love to dance. So I dance. I move my body.

Don’t caloriecount 
I never count my calories. Ain’t nobody got time for that. I do know what is going into my body and I am very aware to eat healthy foods, but calorie counting will just make you afraid of food. Instead, just write down what you eat in a day and look back at how healthy you did. Don’t feel bad if you haven’t had such an healthy day, but see where you can improve yourself.

Meditation 
This is so good for your mental health and will keep you calm through the day to slay your life. You don’t have to sit there for hours. Just a few minutes every morning will make a huge difference.

Looks

Style 
Find out what fits you. This is the fun part. You can experiment with a hundred different styles. Look at what colors suite your skintone and which materials you like to wear.

Here a few styling tips to look and feel more in control:

  • Choose good materials.
  • Don’t wear different shades of jewelry together. Choose between gold, silver or rose gold.
  • Don’t have too much going on. Choose one piece of clothing or jewelry where you want to focus the attention on.
  • Wash and iron your clothes. Never wear dirty or wrinkled clothes.
  • Clean out you bag every night so you’ll just have what you need and you won’t feel dirty.
  • Go for comfortable and stylish. Don’t wear clothes you don’t feel comfortable in cause it will show.

Hair 
Haircare is something that is been overlooked by so many people. But it is actually just as important as skincare. Have a good leave in hair oil for everyday applying. Be kind and patient and go to the hairdresser every few months.

Hygene 
Shower every day. Studies have shown that people are way more productive when they’re clean. So take a shower. Brush your teeth and do your skincare. No excuses just do it.

Mindset

Look 
Have a golden look on the world. This is your life and you, only you, are in control. See the world as a place to bloom and experience all these magical things. Make your own happy moments and opportunities.

Positivity 
Find your way to positivity. Look at your problems with a solving mindset and get the best out of every day.

Files 
We all know the struggle of losing important papers and cards and stressing out over not being able to find them. One good binder or filer will change your life. Just having one place for all of your important stuff is so important. In my binder I have the compartments: “Work” where I keep all my contracts and stuff, “Buying” where I keep all my important receipts, “Cards” where I keep all my important businesscards, etc. etc.

Thank you for reading,

To the stars and back, 


– N

How to network

key hacks I use daily to network.

When starting a business, it can be really helpful to have a team supporting you. A team of different people, with different perspectives and different values. But, how do you find those people?

It can be really hard to get out there in the first place. And if you’re eventually went out, how do you approach? I will talk a lot about how to act and what to do at networking events, but read till the end for some tips on how to find and get to networking events.

1. YES attitude

First of all it is important to grab your opportunities by the balls. Ofcourse the occasional self-care night at home is nice, but when someone invites you out, don’t say no right away. Take a moment and look at all the good things that can happen if you go out. Remember, the biggest regrets are about the things you didn’t do. This also counts for the moment someone tries to open a conversation with you. 

2. Take the risk

When it comes down to starting a conversation, just take the risk. You’re probably scared to be rejected by the other person, but the chance of being rejected is actually much smaller than you may think. Big chance that person is also waiting for someone to make a move. Not only is taking the risk worth it at specific events. You can start a conversation with the person sitting next to you on the train or someone waiting with you in line at the store. If the other person doesn’t feel like talking you’ll know soon enough and you’ve got nothing to lose. 

3. Practice wearing heels

This one obviously only counts if you’re a woman, or if you’re a man who likes to wear heels. And this one may be a long shot. But really, practice. At a networking party you want to look classy and confident, I personally always like to wear heels because they make me feel feminine and empowerd. When networking you want to be fully present in the occuring conversation and don’t want to be stumbling around with hurting feet.

4. 3 guards

When networking, have 3 guards for your mouth; nice, honesty and necessity. This means, before you say anything, ask yourself: is it nice? is it honest? and is it necessary? This way you won’t regret the things you say.  

5. Ask but tell

First of all it is really important to ask a lot. People like to talk about themselves and it makes them feel good. When someone feels good in a conversation, they will get more engaged and it will become easier. The tell part means, tell them about your dreams and about the topics the other person can help you in. For example: you’re talking to a publisher. Your dream has always been to publish a book. Ask them how the job is, what the hardest and the best parts of the job are and wether or not they always wanted to be a publisher. Then you tell him or her that it has always been a dream of yours to publish a book and what criteria you will have to fullfil. This way the publisher knows you’re interested and will be more likely to help you on your way.

6. Practice posture

It is really important to know what vibe you’re sending out. If you are standing tall and confident, people will be more tempted to come over and talk to you than when you are “hiding” yourself by crossing your arms in front of you or bowing your head. Stand tall and smile, you are worthy of being here and there is no one who can stop you from being you.

7. Bring evidence

If you are going out to network to promote your business it is really important to have evidence that you are serious. When you find that person you can help you, you want them to stick with you. So, bring a small version of the product you’re making or a businessplan. This will show the person that this is not simply an idea but a real business. For example I always carry some of the stones the artist made with me, just in case I meet someone who is interested. 

8. Bring businesscards

Like I told you, if you meet someone who seems interested in helping you, you want them to stick with you. By giving them a businesscard, it will be easier for them to contact you. Even if the other person didn’t bring a businesscard, you can write their information on the back of one of the cards. 

9. Be who you are and not who you think you should be

Certain network events can be really overwhelming. It is easy to find yourself being nervous and afraid that people won’t like you for who you are. But let me tell you, the people who don’t like you for who you are really don’t matter. The only people you can build on and grow with are the people who appreciate you for who you are. 

10. Give

Ofcourse you are at a networking event to network and find people and opinions for you business. But it is also important to help other people out. Ofcourse you shouldn’t dim your light so others can shine, but you will create a real bond with someone the moment you teach them something or help them out with a problem. If you help someone out, they will also be more likely to help you out when in need.

So, almost all of the tips above are about networking events and how to act on them. But how do you actually get to networking events? how to find them? Well, to be honest I am very fortunate to have parents who go to a lot of events and invite me with. But if you are not that fortunate here are some tips:

  1. Tell people! When you talk to your friends, family and basically anyone, tell them that you are looking for networking events and why. It is nothing to be ashamed of and maybe the person who can introduce you to the events has been right in front of you all along!
  2. Google. This one you probably could’ve thought of yourself. Google on networking events near your city and just go and check them out.
  3. Ask for help. If you admire someone, and you wonder where they go to network, just email them. You’ll be amazed at how many people really want to help you. And if that person doesn’t reply, well you’ve lost 5 minutes of your time.
  4. Like I said before, you can also just network on the train or at the local store. If you’re in school you also have a lot of people who can help you out. For me, I work at home, it can be hard to get out there and network. But if I want to get out I’ll just go for a walk or to the library. You can also discuss business at party’s. 
  5. And last, but very much not least. Network online! Make sure your social media is on point and contact people. In this time and age it is very important to have your social media together. Know your platforms and use them to tell people what you’re doing with your business. Even if you’ve only got 3 followers! If someone is interested in you or your business, they will go straight to your social media to find more about it.