Secrets to SELFLOVE

Selflove is a very sensitive topic because everyone has a different view on it. But here I am challenging myself to write this article anyway. I want to share my secrets with you because if it even helps you the slightest, I’ve reached my goal.

“One day you wake up and all of a sudden the weight of the last few weeks, months, or even years has been lifted off your shoulders. You can’t control when that day comes, all you can do is stay strong and trust that it is coming.”

It takes time 


Selflove takes time and energy. And I am not going to twirl around it, but it also has a lot to do with the way you were raised and your childhood. Some people were thought to be confident and some are thought not to. So, for some people it will be easier than for others, but no worries, you’ll get there. Be patient with yourself. There is no rush to love.

It lies in the little things

Selflove doesn’t lie in the big majestic things you do for yourself. If you don’t know where to start, here are a few suggestions:

  • Buy yourself flowers
  • Smile to your reflection in the mirror and thank yourself for this day
  • Put on a facemask
  • Cry if you need to, it’s okay, don’t hold it in.
  • Drink a cup of tea and just think

“The aim of life is not perfection, but happiness.”

You can love others without it


Ever heard of the phrase: “You can’t love someone else before you love yourself” ?. You probably have. And I think it isn’t true. I think you can love unconditionally, while finding a way to selflove. I even think those loved ones are the people that will support you and help you discover your love. Never underestimate the power of family, friends and relationships.

The importance

Selflove is really important. You probably already know that but do you actually know why? The question why is really important on this case, so here’s a short explanation: selflove will stop you from holding yourself back from opportunities. It will make sure you’ll step up for yourself when needed because you know what’s your worth. It will make you happy without needing anything or anyone and it will really support your independence.

“Breathe and remember who the fuck you are.”

You can express it in a thousand ways


Everyone has their own way of expressing selflove. One may express it in a shopping day or a spa night. Someone else may express it in spending time with their loved ones and yet another expresses it in working out or changing their diet. This is the part where you can start to experiment. Find what suites you and do your own thing.

I like to express selflove in a lot of different ways:

  • I like to go for a bikeride along a quiet beach and when I am halfway I like to sit on a bench and write down everything that’s on my mind.
  • I like to eat healthy and workout. Not because I hate the way I look but because I want to nurture my body.
  • I like to cry when I feel like it. I want to make it very clear that this is not a sad thing. But sometimes I can feel very overwhelmed and I just need to let it go.
  • I like to thank myself everyday for a new start while doing yoga and meditation. This calms me down and gets me ready for the day.
  • And last but not least, I love pamper nights. I’ll upload a whole article about my pamper routine.

This were just some of my selflove expressions. Maybe this will inspire you to do some yourself.

There are days when you don’t feel it, that’s okay

Honey, one thing. You won’t always feel loved by yourself or anyone. Everyone has bad days and that’s okay. Don’t pressure yourself it will be alright. And if you feel like talking, send me a message and I will be there.

I wish you all the stars,